ON PERMANENT HOLIDAY | The Mental Toughness Coach - Chris Dorris



What do you call a life that reserves joy for maybe 2 of the 7 days of every week? I call it hell. The hell that we experience as a result of the conditioning that led us to choose to create a life that leaves us longing for Friday afternoons and vacations.

“Thank God It’s Friday.” That this saying has become popular enough to result in a super successful restaurant chain is a clear indication that we have permitted ourselves to settle for a life far less rewarding, exciting, invigorating, stimulating, magical and desirable that each of us deserves. We’ve been programmed to reserve our most pleasant psychological states for such a small percentage of our waking existence. We reserve joy for the weekend, or for vacation.

Let’s consider that word “vacation” for a moment. This is another interesting indicator of how we’ve come to settle for mediocre (or worse) lives. Most people work hard all year and accumulate vacation time. This vacation time is the time they spend the rest of the year looking forward to because it’s the only extended time of the year when they’re going actually enjoy themselves the way they wished they could all the time. So they go on “vacation”. That word actually means the act of vacating. To vacate. We vacate our every day hellish lives in order to escape them and go experience the bliss we wish we could have instead every day. And toward the end of the “vacation”, most people start feeling depressed again because they’re preparing to “go back to reality”, or “go back to the grind”. How depressing is this?

If you use the phrase, “Thank God it’s Friday” or if at the end of your weekends and vacations you loathe “going back to reality”, then change that reality! And you can do that in at least one of the following two ways:

1. Create a new life. Every one of us is a creative genius, and we can all create the lives we want regardless of how overwhelmingly unlikely that may seem at times. Change your life, do whatever it takes to fill your life with the reward and the joy and the light-heartedness that you feel when you’re on a dream vacation. Literally make the changes in your outer world that will result in it being easy for you to wake up and say, “Thank God it’s Monday because today I GET TO…” The only thing stopping anyone from making these changes is the belief that it’s not possible, so if that’s your story, change that first.

2. Change the way you’re thinking. As one of my favorite teachers, Wayne Dyer, always says, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Say right now you’re choosing to be the caretaker of your elderly mother who has Alzheimer’s and consequently you don’t have the freedom right now to move to Belize to open your dream wellness center. If you’re feeling burdened by your situation, change the way you’re viewing it. Find the beauty in that. Find the meaning and the reward in that, because it’s there. In any situation where you are making the choice, for whatever reason, to postpone a desire in order to attend to a greater need of your own or someone else’s, love that choice and permit yourself to experience the bliss within that. If Viktor Frankl (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viktor_Frankl) can accomplish that in the concentration camp, then we can do the same in our lives.


The reason I’ve entitled this post “ON PERMANENT HOLIDAY” is that, first, I really love the term “Holiday” over “vacation” and second, we have the ability, every one of us, to live as if we were on permanent holiday. Because, in fact, we are. One way of defining heaven is: THIS. One way of defining hell is: not believing this is heaven. The likelihood of any one of us ever being born is incomprehensibly small. We got into the big party called life. We won the biggest lottery in the history of existence. We’re on permanent holiday, and we get to act that way and get to feel that way, every day.

Imagine the best moods you have ever felt on your best ever holidays (vacations). Recreate that mood now. See if you can feel it. Go back to those places in your mind and see if you can, right now, remember those moods or states of being – those infinitely light, joyous, celebratory, free feelings. If you can’t, keep trying until you can. If you can, you’ve just demonstrated your ability to choose that mood at any given moment in your life. We don’t need to be on Holiday in order to feel those great feelings. We don’t need anything to be different in order to experience those high vibrational states – that total joy and bliss. Except for our thinking.

Never go on vacation again. You don’t need to. When you take a trip somewhere, consider it an outing on your bigger permanent holiday. And stop reserving those amazing moods for such a small percentage of your life. And when you do, you’ll benefit in two ways:

1. You’ll simply feel better more. Much better.

2. When we feel better, we ARE better – at everything. One of the most magical elements of our human experience is that the better we feel the better we are in every possible discipline. The better we feel, the better our health, the better our memories, creativity, athleticism and coordination, capacity for compassion, social skills, emotional strength, and the list goes on.

Enjoy the Holiday!


  1. manisha says:

    what a wonderfull way to look at our life!!!!if we have this attitude we will be in permanent state of joy!! thank yoy chris..indeed you are amazing!! m

  2. Dave C says:

    Chris, you always highlight a path to positve thinking…I am going through the absolute lowest point in my life, but your relentless focus on choosing peace and joy are an inspiration. Thank you my friend! DC

  3. as always, I get great insights when I read your posts. And I love to listen to you speak. You’re awesome. Thanks!

  4. amya says:

    Hi Friend. Thank you. Would you please invite Kelci to join your blog. She could really use it – as much as I do.

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