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March 4, 2014
You Are Not Your Mind

You Are Not Your Mind

The ability to separate yourself from your thoughts is your ticket to freedom. You’re driving down the road and you miss a light. Then another one. Then some dude gets in front of you and goes really slow and you can’t get from behind him. You become livid and start cursing. Why? The only correct response to that question is this: In that moment you are permitting your thoughts to govern you. (Your thoughts in that moment just so happen to suck, because of low-grade interpretations of reality, but that’s a blog post for another day.) You are angry because […]
March 2, 2014
Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Please…Make Yourself Uncomfortable.

  When I was studying in India – learning to free myself from the conditioning of the past that would have me struggle – one of the most powerful lessons was that NOTHING NEEDS TO BE AVOIDED. Not only does nothing need be avoided, everything, when experienced fully, becomes joy. Including “discomfort”. There’s nothing uncool about being uncomfortable. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Growth occurs in discomfort and it doesn’t occur in comfort. And growth is cool. Which makes discomfort cool. Or valuable. Or both. We’re often taught to believe (that’s the “conditioning of our past” to which I constantly […]
February 23, 2014
Trophies

Get Cool With Your Greatness…Again.

Re-strengthen your ability to effortlessly acknowledge your excellence. I stood on the 18th green of a golf course one busy Saturday summer afternoon and asked everyone that just finished their round of golf the following question, “How’d it go?”  Adults answered with miserable responses. Vulgar, in fact. they berated themselves with profanity and shared story after story of how they managed to screw up – or how they GOT screwed. Children, on the other hand, replied with enthusiastic, celebratory stories of their successes. Why is that? Before we are conditioned to do otherwise, we spontaneously view the world in an inspired […]
June 4, 2013
Have-Fun

The Intelligence of Fun

What a powerful two word combo. Have fun. It’s an intelligent instruction. It is intelligent to have fun. In fact, having fun is one of the most responsible things you can do.  You see, if you examine human peak performance research, you’ll quickly discover that people are at their best when they feel their best. So if you’re interested in creating excellence, in any discipline, the you might consider beginning with fun. Isn’t it nice that we evolved in such a way that we excel when we feel great? I suppose it could have happened the other way – where […]
March 19, 2013
Coach-and-Alejandro

Move Toward

In my coaching sessions and keynotes I’m constantly referencing the mantra, “Inherent within your desires are the mechanics for their own fulfillment.” Another way of saying that is, “The ‘How” is inside the ‘What’.” HOW my desires unfold into reality is pre-packaged within the desire itself, or the WHAT.  So when I move toward the desire with the enthusiasm and abundant knowingness of a pre-conditioned child, I activate the mechanics. The mechanism, so to speak, is switched on when I move toward. Some refer to the mechanism as “the organizing intelligence of the universe”. Others call it God. Some refer […]
January 12, 2013
Failure-is-NOT-an-option

Failure Does Not Exist

  If I asked you to help me understand either what a pen is or what failure is, it would be much easier for you to teach me about the pen. The pen is a concrete object. You could simply pick one up, show it to me, show me how to use it and now I know. Failure, on the other hand, is an abstract thing. It’s a construct. You can’t just reach over and pass me the failure. “Failure” is an idea. It’s a label that we agree refers to the circumstance when you do not get what you […]
January 1, 2013

The Return of The Guru (in You)

What makes a “spiritual guru”? Unlearning. Let’s break down the term “spiritual guru”. Spiritual = of spirit, the state of being spirited, joyous, exuberant, awe inspired and free to be transparent – having no internal conflict. Guru = the expert. So who is expert at being that way? Each of us is. As children. Prior to being educated on how to be self-conscious. Before we’re taught to worry about whether we are acceptable or not, adequate or not, we are all free to exist without inhibition. We are free to exist in a state of perpetual causeless joy. Let’s each return to our […]
December 5, 2012

Lifers: An Interview on Mental Toughness Training with the Paolinis

  When they started their 1st round of Mental Toughness Training sessions, Brielle was 12 and Brinson was 9 years old. That was 13 years ago. And they haven’t taken a day off in the interim. Meet the Paolinis. To describe this sister/brother duo as powerful or impressive or even as three standard deviations above the norm in every measurable category feels like a miserably weak understatement. Brielle is currently in her third year in Wake Forest’s MD/PhD Program in Neuroscience (click here for her bio). She graduated Summa Cum Laude from William and Mary – the athlete with the […]
October 20, 2012

FISH ON!!!

  I love deep sea fishing. There is no sport or form of entertainment that, for me, compares to the thrill of landing a massive sea behemoth. Just the possibility alone is so energizing. I’ve spent many a day alone on the sea having caught nothing but having experienced the sensation of “maybe, just maybe, today’s the day” – the excitement of potential. The sea is so vast and so deep and so unknown. It’s another world. And fishing it, especially for the big game, is an exercise of pure uncertainty, contradiction and paradox. And if you can’t deal with those, then the […]
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